Ace and Gary play with kitchen tools

David, we get it. You don’t have to keep trying to prove it. You’re not a journalist. You’re really, really, really not a journalist. You’re an entertainer! You want to dance and sing! You love show tunes! You make campy jokes! You don’t know how to use these complicated kitchen gadgets! I mean, you can “grill a cheese,” but that’s about it! You need some help from that big brawny macho Mark Bittman! And there’s nothing wrong with that.

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