So yeah, Snow Leopard had some issues. The iPod team spent a year and rolled out a Nano with a camera. Now people are bitching about the new iPhone operating system 3.1 update which apparently has a feature called “Coma Mode.” People are even putting up complaints on our own message boards, faster than we can scrub them off.

Apple faithful, I’m going to level with you. I was gone for six months, and people slacked off. They just did. It happens. To be completely honest, for six months before my leave I wasn’t really here that much either. So yeah. They’ve had a year with no Jobso to scare the shit out of them. Rest assured that now that I’m back, the beatings will resume, morale will improve, and the trains will run on time again. And in case you’re still wondering what Apple would be like without Steve Jobs — well, now you know.