Hey, it’s 4:20 on the East Coast

I’m getting loads of mail this week about my deep friendship with Albert “Abbie” Hofmann, the inventor of LSD, which was reported in the Huffington Post a couple days ago. To be honest, I asked Arianna not to run this item. Not because I’m embarrassed. Just because I value my privacy. Anyway, she said she couldn’t hold the story, and I told her I understand, but that she should be careful when she’s out jogging because it’s just so easy to get hit by a car or killed in a drive-by shooting. She understood.

Anyway, on the acid thing. Yes, I did LSD. A lot. And yes, I really benefited from LSD, and I highly recommend it to everyone. But did I give those freaks any money to do their wacky LSD psychology research? No fucking way. As is often the case, I don’t have time or patience with academic approaches to solving problems. As the doctor guy (or whatever he is) says about his meeting with me: “He was still thinking, ‘Let’s put it in the water supply and turn everybody on.'” That is absolutely true. I’ve approached city officials in Palo Alto about doing this in a kind of limited beta program. So far no luck.

Anyway, as for the video above, I hope you enjoy it, and I hope you’ll forgive me for starting my weekend a little bit early, but I just feel like celebrating. What’s to celebrate? Well, I’ve made it through another week alive on the planet. Maybe you take that for granted, but take it from a dude who’s got a black-market liver that’s still trying to knit itself into his body — you shouldn’t. Life is precious. So go enjoy it. Hug your kids. Kiss someone you love. Put away your iPhone and your MacBook and go sit on a patch of grass and just stare up and marvel at the blueness. Like, just be there. Okay? Great. Now would someone please get me a mango smoothie and my fucking medical marijuana? Like, now? And where’s the bong? Where the fuck is Ja’Red? Where’s Katie? Hello? Has everyone gone to BJ’s early again? Okay, fuck it. Fuck all of you guys. I’ll get the bong myself, and when you get back, you’re all fired. I hope you’re reading this as you enjoy that pitcher of beer. Assholes.