Surely by now you’ve seen the stories (like this one in TUAW) about how Epcot has put an animatronic Woz on Spaceship Earth at Epcot. Sad but true story about this is that the real animatronic Woz paid Disney to get himself put on display. In fact he paid extra to have me taken out of the display so he could be there alone. Guy is just determined to cement this myth that he created the personal computer. It’s like his new personal crusade. I’ve told him, Dude, everyone knows there were personal computers before we made our first machine. Gates was going around recently telling people how he was making all sorts of versions of BASIC before we came along. But there’s no dissuading old Woz. He’s determined to make people believe this. And one thing he learned from me (see, he was kind of paying attention sometimes) is that if you tell a lie over and over, enough times, and if you really, really believe it, eventually it becomes the truth. We used to call this the “False To True Conversion Cycle.” We had charts and graphs showing how it worked and how much it could cost to convert any lie to truth depending on the size and complexity and detachment from reality — the whole thing. Now the old FTTCC is so ingrained in our culture that we don’t even need to study it or think about it. We just do it. But I digress. Anyhoo, like Woz told me, Sure it’s going to cost a fortune to make people believe I invented the personal computer, but what the hell, I’ve got shitloads of money and nothing better to do, and at this point in my life it’s all about locking down my place in history. Plus it’s fun to see people keep falling for it.

Have at it, Woz. You big old bear. As Madonna once sang, If it makes you happy, it can’t be that bad.

(The pic originated here.)