Facebook just told all my friends that I bought Tucks online



Nice work, Beacon. Now the email messages are rolling in. To those of you who wrote nice notes, I appreciate the sympathy and yes, things are getting better down there. And yes, I do recommend the product. To all the rest who chose to make sport of another human being’s suffering, shame on you. I will pray for your souls. I will also kick your friggin ass if you ever dare come within fifty feet of me. As for you, Zuckerberg, you’d better start returning my calls, jackass. And don’t think you can bounce me to your flacks like last time. Who the fuck do you think you are? Do you realize who you’re dealing with? I’m Steve Jobs, bitch! I’ve been running this Valley for thirty years. I’ve got pieces of guys like you in my stool. Meanwhile, can anyone explain to me how I opt out of this crazy Facebook spy program? And can anyone explain why Blogger just automatically inserted a product shot into this post? Jesus. What the hell is happening here? Can someone get in here please? Like, now?