Get a load of these two knuckleheads.

They both knock themselves out to prove their devotion to moi. As well they should since I made these goofballs. Just like I made Tom Siebel, Ray Lane, Chuck “Call Me Charles” Phillips, Safra “Don’t Call Me Kitty” Catz and all the other numbnutses I brought in to dress Oracle up for outsiders.

Self-proclaimed psychoanalysts out there posit that I’ve set up a competition between these two newest pseudo sons for my favor.

Insult to injury, reporter types then insist that my stake in one or both (okay, BOTH) of their companies is a conflict of interest. They sniff that sf.com and Netsuite compete with Oracle’s new SMB products.

They don’t get it.

Do they actually think I KNOW how much I own of these companies? There’s more spare change stuck in my various couches (on land and sea) than I’ve invested in this Saasy crap. I just need to keep these crazy kids off the streets. The world should pay ME for that service.

Sans my bankroll, Benioff wouldn’t keep reporters toothless and sedated with special-blend chocolate, writing BJ pieces about how Sf.com invented Software-as-a-Service. More like invented kissing my ass.

So let it go…

And seriously, does anyone think that real sons of mine would sweat this much? In public?

I didn’t think so.

Hey LFS, are you out there? I know you’re on a break, but I just had some great new organic herb jetted in if you want to partake. Give a jingle.