"Yeah, I’d like a family-size bucket of the Colonel’s original recipe. Can you deliver to the mall? I’m the sad-looking guy outside the Apple store."

Speaking of guys who crave attention, how about poor Woz showing up and getting involved helping the retail goons hand out numbers? Dude, my bro, you need to get a job. Again, much love to the Mercury News for this treasure trove of scary/funny/sad photos.