Dear Ashlee Vance: Bite me

Ashlee Vance, the girl-named reporter for the Register, complains because we wouldn’t let him attend WWDC, even though he’s bought a lot of Macs in his life. Boo friggin hoo, loser. You think you can smack-talk us and we’re just going to take it? You think we’re just a bunch of punks? Friend, you’re the one with the lady-boy name, not us. In an attempt to win us over, Ashlee calls our PR people “impolite robots.” Nice move, dick. For the record, we only hire polite robots in our PR department.