Much love to the commenter who sent in a link to this petition from Linux freaks demanding that we make iTunes available on Linux. And they’ve got a whopping 599 signatures. Okay, weirdos! We’ll get right on it. Jesus. You know, if you want to go run some obscure operating system that nobody else uses, fine. But don’t think the whole world owes you free applications too. Go make your own music store, losers. Oh, but no, it’s much easier to just sign petitions. You and the friggin Norwegians. Next they’ll be joining up with the San Francisco Gay Longhairs to protest outside our gates.

Friends, Romans, countrymen (as Billy Joel once said): I urge you to mess with these Free Software freaks by going to their petition and adding as many names as you can — names like Olga Fukyercelf, Dick Hertz, Ima Slut, Ivana Reemyu, I.P. Daley. You get the idea. Let’s do this thing. Let’s make this freako petition a wild success. After you’ve added your names, send in links so we can see your handiwork.

What prank comes next? I’m thinking an assault on the Wikipedia pages of various non-Apple computer makers. More on that later in the week. And if you have some ideas on the kind of things we should say about Dell, Gateway, Sony, et al, please send them in.