I just fired a guy for saying "incentivize"

It was some regional marketing guy from Germany, giving a presentation at the mothership. His boss came back later and said, Look, I know you hate that word, but some dictionaries actually include it now and in fact it’s actually included as a word in the dictionary widget on our computers. I told him I don’t care what the fucking widget says, that word bugs the shit out of me. I’m not some super freak about grammar, but honestly, people, I do have limits. My other pet peeve is “between you and I.” I can’t tell you how many frigtards I’ve fired for using that one, or variations of it — basically any combination that involves using “I” as the object of a preposition. God! It makes me friggin nuts! Now everyone is terrified to talk around me and every once in a while some poor bastard gets halfway into a sentence and then can’t remember which one is the right one and ends up saying something like, “between you and, um … between the two of us.” Sometimes I fuck with these people and say, You sure you don’t mean between the two of we? Half of them can’t tell if I’m serious and they start wondering of “the two of we” is maybe the grammatically correct version and then they just sit there with eyes filled with terror and the tiny gears spinning in their tiny brains, figuring now they’re fired. Which they are. God I love my job. I really, really do. I mean, look at that guy, with his greasy hair and his porno beard. Wouldn’t you love to fire him? Of course you would.