R.I.P., Norman Mailer

Rest in peace, Norman Mailer.
O brawler & drinker,
O winner of Pulitzers, you
wrote great books
yet the literary establishment
refused to acknowledge
your genius.
The Naked and the Dead.
The Executioner’s Song.
These were fine, important works,
& I wanted to finish them
but I only got about halfway.
I’m sorry. They were really long.
Did you not have an editor?
If they were shorter I think
they might have sold better.
Just a thought.
Jon Ive says you were a total
closet case because your books
are filled with buggery.
I think that’s a bit unkind of him.
Even though we both agree
that even if it’s true
there’s totally nothing wrong with that.
You also had some issues
with women. Like, you
stabbed your wife in the boob,
which was not cool.
And you challenged Billie Jean King
to that tennis match, which was
a big mistake, because
she totally kicked your ass.
My advice would be you should
forget about sports
& stick to writing.
But I guess it’s too late for that now.