Zuckerberg: Facebook now worth $50 billion. No, $60 billion. Oh wait–


No guff. This baby-faced punk kid has got balls like a gorilla. Few days ago he was turning away Microsoft, saying their offer to buy a piece of Facebook at a $10 billion valuation wasn’t high enough because his profitless company was worth $15 billion. Now he’s telling analysts that the price has gone up again and the company is worth $50 billion. Filthy hack asked him, “Did you say fifteen billion, as in one-five billion, or fifty billion, as in five-zero?” And Faceberg confirms it’s the latter. He says they arrived at the number because they have 40 million members and each one should be worth just over a thousand bucks. Based on what? Who knows. Who cares. Does it even matter? This thing is tethered to reality like a helium balloon is tethered to the earth. Faceberg, you are a bold new breed of Silicon Valley huckster. You make the guys who run Yelp look like amateurs. Namaste. I honor the place where your chutzpah becomes one with reality.

UPDATE: I’ve just been informed that the valuation has gone up again. Just in the time it took me to write this, Facebook has gone to $60 billion. Wow. Bubble 2.0, baby.