Handicapable people, I am truly sorry

So we’re being sued because our stores are difficult to navigate if you’re in a wheelchair. See here. Two gals who had difficult experiences in our store are suing us. I must say, my first reaction when I heard about this suit was probably the same one most Apple faithful have: Fuck ‘em. Like you, I figured this was probably just another shakedown. These days now that we’re popular and making loads of money everybody is crawling out of the woodwork to shake us down for a few bucks. I figured one or both of these gals who are suing us is probably related to the lawyer bringing the suit, and they all sat around one night cooking up some idea and then sent the two gals into the store and made sure they couldn’t reach a piece of software or whatever.

But you know what? I looked into this. I went and viewed the security tapes from the One Stockton Street store. The women have a legitimate beef. Our store really is almost impossible to navigate if you’re in a wheelchair. The counters are too high. The software is up on shelves. The cash registers are up on counters instead of being down on a low stool or the floor. And it’s not just this one store in San Francisco. Many of our big stores have the same issues. And it’s not just people in wheelchairs who are having trouble. People who are — I’m not sure what the politically correct term is now — but people who are, let’s say, extremely small in stature, will experience many of these same issues.

I’ve instructed our lawyers to pay these women whatever amount they want. We’ll sue the architects who designed the building to recover our costs. From the very beginning of our company our goal has been to bring computing to everyone, to make the power of computers accessible to as many people as possible. It’s why we did this. It’s what we’re all about. I had no idea these stores were so inaccessible. I guess we focused so much on making them beautiful and cool that we forgot to make them practical. I am deeply, deeply ashamed of our company right now.

To anyone else who feels they’ve had a bad experience, for whatever reason, please hire a lawyer and file a complaint and we will pay you whatever amount you choose, in a prompt and professional manner, without challenging or questioning your claims.