What is up with this stock market?

Not that I care, because I don’t. I don’t even know how many shares of stock I own. I’m told that it’s a lot. Not that I would know. Because I have no idea how many shares Apple has given me over the years. I don’t even care about money. Ask anyone who knows me. I’m all about the creativity. But what is going on? Someone takes a shot at Cheney, and things get a little rough in China, and suddenly nobody in New York can hold their mud? So much for the big tough-guy rep of New Yorkers. Look, get a grip, people. That’s not even the real Cheney we sent over there, for one thing. Look at the photos. He’s a stand-in. As for the Chinese, who cares what happens to their stock market? These are people who blow off firecrackers and read the gunpowder spray to figure out which stocks are gonna go up or down. Or something. Man oh man.