I suppose you’ve seen the stories about supposedly
forged documents, and me hiring a criminal lawyer who also represented Frank Quattrone. All I’m gonna say is, Look, I have no idea about any of this options stuff. I am all about the creativity. And I do not want to lose one precious minute of design time worrying about something as crass and meaningless as money. Ask anyone who knows me. I don’t care at all about money. I could wipe my butt with hundred-dollar bills and not even care. And yes, I’ve done that. The butt thing, I mean. Anyhoo. To all my fans and followers, let me just reassure you that the Jobsmeister is in fine shape and sleeping like a baby. And the only thing I’m thinking about is designing gorgeous shiny new products. That, and occasionally, whether it would be possible to just disappear here in Eastern Europe, and how much it would cost to have plastic surgery to change my looks, and hire a body double to go to Macworld and pretend to be me, and whether I could stage my own death and get the CIA to cover my tracks. Okay. I’ve said too much. Peace out.